Sleep is a Four-Letter Word
Ask any new parent and they will tell you – sleep is a thing of the past. Memories of lazy weekend mornings spent snoozing in bed until noon are filed away alongside memories of late night adventures in clubland and going for hikes at an adult pace without carrying a small child and all their accoutrements. When Claire was born, I expected the worst. Sleepless nights followed by hectic days chasing an active kid around the park. Feedings every hour or two for months on end, never sleeping for more than 2 or 3 hours at a time.
And yet I find myself here: with a baby who sleeps. A baby who sleeps well, almost every night. Who sleeps 6 hour stretches regularly, and who only wakes to feed once or twice in the night, despite sleeping right next to the source. Could it be true, I asked myself? I scarcely dared to tell anyone, lest I break the spell.
Seven weeks on, Claire hasn’t changed a bit. She still sleeps well, goes to sleep without a great deal of fuss, often falls asleep in her bed by herself and doesn’t nurse nearly as often as I thought she would.
The thing is, I’m almost afraid to tell other moms because, well, won’t they hate me? Or worse yet, will they think that I’m doing something they aren’t, and beat themselves up for having a kid who doesn’t sleep well, or who keeps them up all night nursing around the clock? Sleep is the parenting holy grail, something parents chase after and try to attain at almost any cost, and it has fallen right in my lap. How did that happen? The lottery of genetic recombination, I suppose, and a whole lotta luck.
If I knew how to guarantee that other women could have a 4 hour labour followed by a baby who sleeps through the night I’d write a book and sell it like hotcakes.
That’s great that you have a baby who sleeps. Although pretty much everything else has been a challenge, we are also getting a good amount of sleep with a baby who naturally goes for long night stretches. Although, now that I’ve said that I have probably destined myself for sleepless nights!
Well, if you’re getting good sleeps now enjoy them while they last! Kids change so fast – just when you think you know what to do they go and change it up. Claire will have her share of sleepless nights too, but it sure is nice that it’s not happening right now.
I echo your feelings. Despite my inexperience in all of this new baby business, I was surprised to learn that the amount that Benjamin sleeps is actually *abnormal* compared to what others have told me their experiences have been. In the beginning, he always slept in three hour intervals. This made it very easy to get used to and I was able to time my sleep along with him. Now that he’s a little bigger and eating a little more, he’s sleeping a little longer. I’ve found that the amount he sleeps is directly proportional to how much he eats (I was able to gauge this with the whole pump-then-feed thing). 3 ounces = 3 hours of sleep; 4 ounces = 4 hours of sleep. Now that he’s on the breast, I think he’s getting more than 4 ounces – as a result, he’s sleeping more than four hours at eight weeks. We’ve had more and more 5 & 6 hour stretches – even had eight hours one night! I was up every hour checking on him anyway because I thought that something HAD to be wrong
My mom keeps telling me how lucky I am and how good a baby he is (compared to how we were I guess) – since I have nothing to compare him to, I wasn’t sure. In listening to other moms, I realize that I am pretty damn lucky to have won the sleepy baby lottery (at least for now)!
There’s definitely the feeling that you’re afraid to tell people who are having a helluva time with their sleepless peanuts. There’s also the feeling that if you say it out loud, you’ll jinx it and they’ll be awake all day and all night.
Funny how no matter what the situation – positive or negative – we feel guilty about *something*.